February 8, 2009

Learning to Lead: One Horse (Girl) at a Time

Picture this: A cold October morning. The fog is clearing slowly making way for a cool winter sun. You’re tired.  You’re slightly hungry and a tad bit excited.  This is the field trip with your classmates you’ve been abuzz about for the past few weeks.  You yawn. You stretch. You bundle up a little tighter in your down coat and favorite fuzzy mittens and hat. And then you see them, three horses moving slowly across the field into the arena where you sit in a circle with your friends.  You’re nervous. You’ve been around horses only once before, but they were horses tied to a railing with a strong rope.

These horses are loose and moving toward you, all 1000 pounds of them. And as one approaches, that feeling you once thought of as hunger shifts to something tight and light all at the same time. There is one horse so close you can smell her – earth and dust and warmth.  She nudges your elbow, bobs her head with a snort, and you find yourself giggling.  She has just said hello and you can think of nothing else but reaching out to touch the dark curve of her head with your pink fuzzy mitten.

Every year, the incoming class of Seattle Girls’ School (SGS) 5th graders lives this picture. They bundle up against the weather, pile into cars, and journey southeast to Silk Purse Farm in Enumclaw to join Peggy Gilmer and her horses.  While this might seem like a fun field trip away from the rigors of academics, the lessons learned are lifelong and transformational.
Peggy is known as an Executive Coach having worked for many years with executives from around the country helping them reach their full potential as managers and leaders of their respective corporations.  In 2003, Peggy teamed up with SGS and their 5th grade class to pilot a leadership program that has now become a key component of their curriculum.
The importance of this field trip has unfolded organically over the years.

“It was clear from the beginning,” says Trina Smith, SGS art teacher, who has participated in all the field trips over the years, “there was magic the second the girls entered the ring. It wasn’t clear how that would translate into the classroom, but their time with the horses and Peggy stayed with the girls all year and it was easy to use the lessons to reinforce their learning.”

The horses offered the teachers another way of understanding their students. They were no longer just students, but they were girls with fears and dreams, natural proclivities and vast experiences that are often hidden in the classroom. Being around the horses, “…puts the girls in a more relaxed mode allowing them to access their true and highest selves,” explains first year SGS 5th grade teacher Anastacia Tolbert, “Something teachers don’t always get to see.”

While the teachers observe from the sidelines of the arean, they take on the role of students – learning about each individual girl and her unique leadership potential. “The tools Peggy offers the girls,” adds 5th grade co-teacher, Nini Hayes, “allows the girls to envision their own ideas of leadership and helps them define what kind of leader they want to be.”

It’s growing more evident that we are in a time of upheaval and change from election campaigns to economic crises.   To soothe our worry and inform our choices, radios and televisions are rampant with political pundits and financial analysts.  A dichotomy of leadership parades before us in campaign ads and speeches from Barack Obama to John McCain: from Joe Biden to Sarah Palin; from Christine Gregoire to Dino Rossi.  But if you ask the 5th grade class what makes a good leader their opinions will run the gambit from being responsible and kind to being brave and willing to take risks.  While able to identify characteristics of a leader, at the beginning of their first year at SGS they struggle seeing themselves in that role.

“I’m just a normal school girl,” says one student.

“I don’t really want to be [a leader],” adds another. “I consider myself too small.”

In steps, Peggy and her marvelously patient horses meet each girl at that junction between leadership as an abstract and leadership as a personal strength – unique and distinctive.

Peggy works with each girl for approximately 15 minutes, but in that time she is able to analyze the student. “Within two minutes,” explains teacher Nini Hayes, “Peggy has an understanding of each girl’s qualities and is able to work with them at that level.” While some students work with Peggy, others students groom horses with Suzanne Williams, a friend of Peggy’s and a gracious volunteer. Still others work with Jose Velasquez, Peggy’s farm manager, picking up rocks in the pastures and mucking out horse stalls in the barn. Grooming and manual labor turn out to be surprisingly fun for the girls, though the girls wait in anticipation for their time in the arena with Peggy and her horses.

Peggy’s approach focuses on three key elements: Connection, Presence, and Intention.  At the beginning of each session, Peggy encourages the girls to connect with the horse, to run their hands over the warm coat to see how the horse reacts. Some girls step forward boldly while others offer up fingertips and jump back when the horse twitches or shifts her back legs.
Once the student feels comfortable Peggy asks, “How do you think the horse is reacting?”  As the student calms, so does the horse and Peggy asks each girl to recognize the relaxed features of the horse – quiet ears, gentle licking, bowed head.  Perhaps a simple beginning, but for Peggy connection is a key component of quality leadership.

“If a leader isn’t aware of the people she’s working with then she can’t lead them anywhere,” Peggy tells the girls. “No one will feel like following you if don’t take the time to know them. It’s the same with horses.”

Next, Peggy demonstrates the voice and body commands to which the horse will respond.  “Invite the horse to walk with you,” Peggy demonstrates and with the gentle grace of a dancer, she sweeps her extended arm in a welcoming gesture.  Calmly, the horse follows. Without a lead rope or any coercion, the horse bows her head and walks next to Peggy across the arena, turning on Peggy’s command and stopping as she lifts her arms above her head in a halting motion.

Girl after girl attempts the same, some with more success than others.  “Keep your head up,” Peggy instructs, “Look where you’re going. Leaders don’t look at the dirt.”

And girl after girl stands taller, lifts her head and throws back her shoulders marching across the arena following Peggy’s inspiring command to “walk as if you rule the world.”

Once working with the horse, each girl is reminded to stay present. “Don’t think about the past or the future,” Peggy says, “Think about right now. Be present with the horse. If you wander, they’ll stop following you.” As if on cue, the horse turns from the girl leading her and wanders off to the corner of the arena.

“What’s your intention?” Peggy asks refocusing the student’s attention. Every student shrugs at this question and in a supportive way, Peggy encourages them to set a goal. “Walk that horse to the orange cone. See her walking right next you. In your mind’s eye, hold the intention of placing that horse’s nose right on the top of that cone.”

This is often when the transformation happens.  Without variation, each girl stands a bit taller, walks with more confidence, and boldly (one of Peggy’s favorite words) marches to the orange cone with the 1000-pound horse following her lead.  Each girl points to the top of the orange cone and as if by magic, the horse places her nose on top.

“Love that horse,” Peggy instructs with pride, “Put your heart in your hand and love that horse.”

The smiles of each girl are priceless.  In partnership, they have stepped in the role of leader whether hesitantly or confidently and remained connected, present, and intent on achieving a goal.  For some the goal is simply to walk taller, for others it’s to make the horse walk backward on command. For all it is a chance to see themselves as leaders and more importantly, as leaders with potential.

The day ends as it began though now the sun is warm and the winter clothes lie in heaps at the edge of the arena.  Peggy asks, “What did you learn about yourself?” As they move around the circle, some girls quietly pass not quite ready to share their insights. Others offer up gems.

“I learned about intention,” submits the smallest student in the class. “I learned how to use my mental capacity and intention in a positive way.”

Around the circle they go, with each girl sharing their unique and powerful experience with full explanations –“I learned that I need to be responsible,” says one girl, “And have authority when leading others.” Another student offers a common Peggy-ism, to be, “as soft as I can be and as bold as I need to be.” – and one-word epiphanies fill the arena – confidence, presence, patience.
As they pile back into cars to make the long trek home, the girls are eager to carry these lessons home to their daily lives. They snack on the last of their lunch and giggle about horse dung and dirty stalls. In the spring, the students will return not only in celebration of their first year together at SGS , but also as a way to fine tune their growing leadership skills.  The spring session will be more student-driven with the girls creating a goal of what they’d like to accomplish when working with the horses.  In years past, these goals have been extremely personal.

“I want to be a better friend,” Peggy remembers one girl saying and another asking to work on “Being able to take more risks in my life.”

Meanwhile, financial advisors and politicians are wading through stock portfolios and national polls planning their own role in the ever-growing uncertainties of the world. But those worries are a world away from this moment of connection, presence, and intention. In the glow of the October sun, the shining faces of future leaders say goodbye to Peggy, Suzanne, and Jose with hugs, and tired waves to the most patient teachers they’ll ever know – the horses.

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